Finally getting clarity

Before I found out about my Asperger’s, I was in a place where I had a good life, but I felt stuck. Something was off. I just couldn’t describe it.

I knew I needed some answers. I had some extreme fascinations with some subjects. But anything outside of that realm bored the life from me. I hated social situations. Small talk is a no go area. Sarcasm? Forget about it! And reading social cues never got easier. Up until then I’d palmed this off – perhaps I’m just odd? Perhaps there’s no answer, I just have to deal with this.

This lack of clarity is felt in many neurodiverse people, both before and after a diagnosis. But not knowing clouds our judgment. And forces us to behave in a “normal” way to fit in.

Then, it all changed. When Cathy, my Autism Specialist, made very clear that much of my behaviour was aspie. In fact, a combination between ADHD and Asperger’s that, I was surprised to find, is rather common.

Finally I felt some clarity.

Clarity helps us to understand. To take action. To feel energised.

Without that clarity I’m sure I’d forever be running around in circles trying to desperately to find an answer to my odd behaviour.

Now I can research and experiment with strategies to live a good (enough) life. To be like a human guinea pig for everyone else.

And I love that. After having seizures in 2016 I refused to take my medication, favouring a routine of meditation, exercise, cold showers, and no-caffeine to recover. And it worked. Much to the amazement of my neurologist, Dr. Schumacher, who called me the model patient. Apparently, most people just want the drugs. Fuck that! I’m not pumping my body full of chemicals when I there has to be natural alternative.

And with that knowledge, I feel I am the perfect person to go out and try as much as I can to live a good (enough) life with ADHD and Asperger’s.

So, follow along. Try out my strategies. Tell me how you get on – what you do and you don’t like about them. And if you ever have questions, I’m here to talk them through with you.

PS: you may notice I use the phrase “the good (enough) life”. That’s because there are too many expectations on both neurodiverse and neurotypical people to be exceptional. To live the good life. When I believe that’s just setting 99% of people up for certain failure and having lower expectations is the key to happiness.